Monday, December 20, 2004

Distractions

I made a mistake and turned on the TV last night, the Hallmark Channel. I did it to distract the grandson with a Christmas movie so I could have time to read the Sunday morning newspapers. Big mistake. It distracted SH from watching out for Little J. I never did get to open the newspaper.

So here it is Monday and I'm realizing that there are only five days left til the big day. The Christmas parties with friends are over (except for SH's company dinner tonite) and it's time to concentrate on the family parties. I haven't shopped. Haven't bought one item for any family member. Don't have a Christmas tree and now it looks like we might not get one. Haven't sent out Christmas cards... my printer jammed up this weekend and won't take cardstock anymore and I'm not going to go out and buy another printer just to print cards. Maybe I'll send out New Years cards. Maybe I won't. I haven't made Christmas cookies. Heck, I haven't even figured out who is going where on Christmas Eve or Christmas Day.

Yesterday was the day that I was supposed to catch up on all this stuff. But I got distracted. I decided I needed to go to church. I needed to hear that big pipe organ and a choir full of Christmas Carols and a twenty minute sermon about why we celebrate this season. On the way out the door the preacher looks at me, "should I know you?" he asks. I remember what Dad used to say about people like me who show up twice a year, Christmas and Easter. I'm guilty. I shake the preachers hand and mutter somewhat of an apology for being one of those who shows up only a couple of times a year.

Reading through the bulletin, I saw they were having a Christmas concert that afternoon. I could use that I thought. I need some good old fashioned Christmas carole kind of joy. Then I see the agenda is Magnificat. I'm not sure what that is but it sounds to heavy so I change my mind.

My sister says she's going to Fairyland with a friend to see Santa. So I get distracted and figure it would be good to take my grandson to Fairyland too. Little J is all excited and runs up the clocktower, careens down the slide, slips down into Jonah's belly, and races through Alice in Wonderland's tunnel. We ride the train. I watch him, remembering my own trip through Fairyland fifty years ago, delighted to see that some things have not changed.

Little J eats his free cookie instead of decorating it first. We keep looking for Santa. We keep missing him. Finally we find out that Santa is seeing children in the Chapel. We get there only to find out that Santa is on a break. It seems he can't work through his four hour volunteer shift without having a lunch break... we find him at the snack stand, beard askew, leisurely fortifying his belly with a hamburger and fries. While our clock is ticking forward, the Fairyland clock ticks backwards. But we must move on. We have two parties to go to and this was not on the agenda.

We made it to one party. We had to skip the second one. It's my fault. I got distracted. I went to church. I went to Fairyland. And I watched that sappy Hallmark movie.

Little J gets up early this morning and follows me around as I'm hurrying through my morning routine. I'm rushing to the door at 7:58 to make the two minute walk to work. Little J grabs my hand. I bend down for a bear gripping hug and then pry his fingers away and try to distract him, sending him away to chase the cats. My tears well up as I hear his shrieks behind the door. I want to stay home and play with Little J, go see Santa, bake cookies, buy and wrap gifts, put up a tree.

So what's the message here? Hmmmm maybe I still don't get it. Christmas is five days away. I must work four of those days. I have two evenings already filled with commitments. That leaves two evenings for shopping, wrapping, eating the cookies that others baked and... distractions. Does it really matter if any of it gets done? And why am I sitting here writing this? Cause I'm distracted.

2 comments:

bryn said...

oh oh better find that christmas spirit...fast

Shirl said...

Merry Christmas! Be sure to wear a red hat!!!!